Infidelity or Extra Marital Affairs has the dubious distinction as the reason for most divorces happening in Kerala. Extra marital affairs create enough stress in the family to break it beyond repair. Read on to discover ways of avoiding the perils of infidelity and leading a normal, happy married life.
The biggest hindrance to dealing with infidelity or extra marital affairs is denial. In most cases, there will be a trusting partner who don't have a shadow of doubt about what is going on. And, the infidel, in most cases will deny he or she has an affair.
When caught, everyone think it is a family or personal problem. It is not. It is a problem. It has a solution. Professional help will solve the problem without significant damage. Allowing family or friends in the issue will only make the issue complicated.
While they may be able to suppress the relationship for a while, the underlying problem won't get a solution. The longer the takes, the bigger the outburst can become. Turn to professional help whenever there is a shadow of another person in a family. Shortcuts or topical treatments are not going to work. You need a real solution to infidelity problems.
Some Background Information on Extra Marital Affairs
The ugly truth is, infidelity has always been there – everywhere in the world and any time since family is instituted. Both the male and female partners are prone to infidelity. The causes of infidelity or extra marital affairs have been studied wide and deep. The only conclusion is, it happens most of the time.
In other words, extra marital affairs is nothing new. The history of infidelity goes as far back as to the beginning of families.
Sex is one reason – 'my husband has low sex drive, but I want to enjoy sex life', said Ms X without a shadow of guilt in her voice.
Emotional support is another reason. The husband and wife are not emotionally available for each other. They will then turn to coworkers or wherever emotional support is available.
Thrill of having an extra marital affair – is another reason for infidelity. In many cases, the extra marital affair has nothing to do with sex, intimacy, emotional support or anything. The thrill of having a casual fling, or a one-night-stand is all they want.
Problems of Infidelity
If you are caught, your partner will think about you as a cheat and a worthless person. Associating themselves with such a person is a stressful, and emotionally overbearing experience for them. This is reason why there will be emotional outbursts. This is reason why the marriage can be ended in a Family Court.
If you don't want to be seen as a worthless infidel, you need to come out of the idea of having someone on the side. Thousands of people have ruined their family lives seeking cheap thrills. If you don't want to be one among them, you need professional help.
If you catch your partner with another relationship, you too will feel the same – worthless, cheated and destroyed. And, that feeling is not something you want in your life.
Seek Solution from Qualified Persons
Don't talk about your problem to your friends or family. Don't talk it to your priest. They can't give you the real solution you need. Seek the help you need. And don't think extra marital affair is something your family can 'talk over'.
Most people will see this situation as talking about their problems to a stranger, say a counselor. The truth is, counsellors, as professionals, have been dealing with such issues for a long time, and helping families strengthening bonds.
Unlike with family members and friends, your problem remains confidential. They won't reveal the issue to people who trust and respect you. Now, what is your choice?
Our article published in Arogyapadmam Magazine - December 2018
Our Article published in Our KIDS Magazine-October 2018